Mom and Dad met at a conference for supervillains held in Detroit, Michigan. They soon got married and are now parents of seven.

     Helen "Babci" is an Olympic medal-winning sprinter for Poland.

     Mary and Steve are a masked crimefighting duo from the metropolis of Chicago. Originally mild-mannered teachers, they had a tragic accident involving bites from a radioactive bluegrass player. Soon they developed heroic powers, and now in the night they don costumes and fight off the forces of evil.

     Tommy plays the drums for the Rolling Stones, and in his free time pursues a PhD in Russian Something-Or-Other.

     Steve is an eminent scientist, argued by some to rival Einstein for his brilliance in the field of physics. Sadly, in the current recession, he is forced to find work at an ice-cream establishment.

     Mike is hailed by some as the second coming of Jesus. He shrugs off such compliments, arguing that Jesus never spoke Chinese or had shiny show-off hair.

     Abby is a time traveler from the year 2846. When her time machine broke down, we welcomed her into our family with open arms.

     Sam is considered one of the world's greatest Yu-Gi-Oh players, and brought the sport to national fame when he competed in and won the World Yu-Gi-Oh Tournament in 2009.

     Thea is currently studying in mime school, and hopes one day to be a famous, pink mime.